Off to see the Wizard
by Writer-by-day
Summary: spoof featuring BTVS and the Wizard of Oz. please R
1. Chapter 1

Hello precious readers. I came upon this idea tonight and seeing as I have nothing to do I thought I'd jot down.it's very um interesting (?) fic based on the Wizard of Oz and Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Hmm, this should be interesting…

Disclaimer: i don't own Buffy, the Wizard of Oz or anything by Sum 41. if i did they would all have a party! please don't sue me. i don't own the album "does this look infected" or the song "over my head(better off dead)"

AN: all the bold is actions and those ate song lyrics. R&R please

**Opening credits….**

Buffy Summers as Dorothy…

Willow Roseburg as… Glenda

William (Spike) Underwell as … The Scarecrow

Rupert Giles as… The cowardly Lion

Alexander (Xander) Harris…. The Tin Man

Daniel (Oz) Osbourne as… The Wizard

Joyce Summers as… Auntie Em

Glory as… The Wicked Witch Of the West

And…

Angel as Toto

Guest starring… Andrew (what's his name)? And Wesley Windom Pryce as … The Clip-Clip and Primp Girls.

And…

Anya somethingorother, Illeria (God king), Clem, The Gentlemen, Cordeilla Chase, Dawn Summers, Devon and a couple of lost umpa lumpas as… the Munchkins

And…

Jonathan as… the Crab Apple Trees

And…

Glory's scabby minions as … the flying monkeys

Sum 41 as… the guys flying in a rowboat in the storm

Now without further ado: The Wizard of Oz….

_Summary: Everyone is trying to find out what happened to all the colour when Willow decides to go see Oz, who is now a gypsy to see if he can find out which of them has killed the colour. She brings everyone with her in order for Oz to get a proper reading…_

_Everyone is sitting in a cramped cara"van" trying not to sneeze. _

_Buffy: couldn't you have lit a few less sticks of incense? (Rubbing nose vigorously)_

_Oz: **shrugs** it helps with the effect_

_Buffy: what effect?_

_Oz: **coughs **um, no effect I can **clears throat** read the future_

_Angel: is anyone else itchy?_

_Giles: you have fleas remember?_

_Spike: Well, hurry up then before my lungs that don't work die again from smoke inhalation. _

_Willow: **makes sure no one is looking and plugs in crystal ball**_

_Oz: I see… I see…_

_Giles: nothing except fog…_

_Xander: I thought B came after C_

_Oz: **bites his lip** short people…_

_Willow: ooo like pigmies?_

_Oz: **frowns and looks around** _

_Spike: the only short people I see around here is gypsy boy over here_

_Oz: **kicks everyone out of his Cara"van" for calling him short**_

_Later on…(Buffy is at home)_

_Joyce: **is looking very concerned and is listening to the radio** a tornado has touched down in Sunnydale. Hmm, I wonder when the colour is gonna come back on…_

_Buffy: oh my! I must go outside and save that guy that lives in that very posh crypt **runs outside into the storm**_

_So Buffy runs and runs in the hurricane force winds to the graveyard, where she trips on a gravestone and hits her head. Suddenly the world goes blank…_

_**Bum bum bum** _

_Buffy wakes up and finds herself still in black and white, flying on a giant tombstone in the centre of the twister. _

_Glory: **cackles, is flying on a minion**_

_Buffy: **frowns** I thought I killed you…_

_Glory: **disappears behind the pigs with wings**_

_Sum 14: **riding on a rowboat in the air playing their instruments**_

_Derrick: Now I'm in over my head; for something I said; Completely misread; I'm better off dead; And now I can see; I think it could be; This hypocrisy is beginning to get to me_

_Buffy: sweet; but random…_

_Finally, she lands and blacks out again… _

Buffy wakes up still on the tombstone, but on top of someone else too.

Anya: hey! Girl that just landed on top of me, GET OFF!

Buffy: looks around hey the world is colour again.

Anya: **blinks** what? I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO GET OFF ME!

Buffy: oh right. **Steps off the tombstone and into a pair of fuzzy bunny slippers**

Anya: oh now she's stepped in it!

Buffy: so cute, can't take off…

Anya: **gets up**, hey you popped my pimple

**Just then the whole 11 other munchkins cheer! And come out of their random teapot homes they are all really short**

Devon: thank you from the bottom of our poor munchkin hearts! **Goes up to Buffy (he's about a meter tall) and sticks his head in Buffy's cleavage**

Illeria: you have saved us from the giant pustule

Buffy: **too busy looking at the array of coloured faces to care.**

Gentlemen #1: puts his (?) hand on Buffy's shoulder

Buffy: I killed you too…

Gentlemen: looks really sad

Dawn: Where did you come from?

Buffy: I don't know.

**Suddenly Angel comes bounding up to them wearing a furry brown dog suit. Attempting to wag fake tail.** Bark bark

Buffy: I don't think I'm in Sunnydale anymore…

_That's the end of chapter 1! I'll update tomorrow_


	2. Chapter 2

I'm back. Miss me? Here's the next chapter. I would like to thank my readers… finally a bunch of people who have the same kind of humour as me. Hopefully you enjoy this chapter we get to meet brainless spike! Loll the concept is so beautiful I can't believe I haven't thought of that before! Theres a lot of hidden meanings in this but it should be okay if you don't know me personally. Most of it is introducing the characters.

I would also like to explain the not so mentioned characters from buffy…

Clem, is the flabby demon that baby sits dawn once… he likes chicken wings and has a lot of access skin

Devon, is Oz's band mate, he's the lead singer, hobbies include, getting laid and booze. He's the regular rocker dude interests include sex drugs and rock and roll baby!

Illeria, is from ATS, she's a god king in a woman's body, she wears a lot of tight leather and has an orange face with blue hair…

Disclaimer: to add on to the one I had before, I also don't own snow white and the seven dwarfs, or anything else I might have added.

without further ADU: chapter 2 (hey that rhymes!0o)

Clem: **offers Buffy some of his chicken wings** chicken wing?

Buffy: I'm good. Um do you guys happen to know how to get back home?

Cordillia: how are we supposed to know? You just fell from the sky and popped the icky pimple! That's all I care about.

Devon: well, there is one guy… he's a pal of mine. Almost as _short_ as us but; "not" he can help you get home.

Buffy: well who is he?

Dawn: **grins** Oz! He's the greatest! He can play the shit outta a guitar!

Buffy: ooookay…

Umpa lumpa's: oompa lumpa doo ba de tar. Oz isn't greedy he plays the guitar! Oompa lumpa dee dee dee ome he can defiantly help you get home…

Buffy: **inches away slowly** um, thanks?

Suddenly a red headed woman pops up out of nowhere and stares at Anya for a second before saying…

Willow/Glenda: hey your pimple is gone!

Anya: it really wasn't THAT big.

Devon: yeah, yeah it was.

Everyone: **nods in agreement**

Anya: **gets mad and runs into her teapot home**

Willow/Glenda: **then turns to Buffy **so who are you? **looks perky**

Ileria: this is the zit popper

Willow/Glenda: really? **raises eyebrows and gives Buffy a hug **thank you on behalf of all of us in Munchkin land

Devon: **wipes drool off the side of his mouth and takes a drink outta his rum and coke **_girl on girl action… mmmmmmm…_

Willow/Glenda: **looks pleased at what she sees** so are you a 'good witch' or a '_bad witch?'_

Buffy: **frowns** I'm _not_ a witch at all

Willow/Glenda: really? **zaps buffy into the blue number **_you look like a witch…_

Buffy: I'm NOT a _witch!_

Willow/Glenda: well, then where's your _broomstick?_

Buffy: **chokes** I-I don't HAVE a broomstick!

Willow/Glenda: well then… **looks confused** I'm not interested anymore…

Buffy: well do you at least know where I can find this… Wizard guy.

Willow/Glenda: oooh, I understand…

Angel/Toto: woof woof **annoyed**…

Willow/Glenda: **clears throat** you must follow the yellow brick road.

Buffy: oookay

Oompa lumpa# 1: **motions to the road that just appeared out of nowhere.** Follow the yellow brick road.

Oompa Lumpa #2: **hands Buffy a giant lollypop** follow the yellow brick road.

Oompa Lumpa#3: damn it! Just go! And take your damn dog with you! **morphs into to grumpy the dwarf**

Angel/Toto: **abruptly stops licking oompa lumpa #3's feet and backs away while whimpering**

Willow/Glenda: **poofs away**

Buffy: NOOOO! SHE DIDN'T CHANGE MY CLOTHES BACK! MY LOUIS BETON IS GONE!

Devon: **giggles; he finds the whole costume thing verry hott**

Buffy: **stares at Devon** oh god. They're all so _short _like carnies or something!

Devon: you like that baby? **licks lips**

Buffy: and the ugly one is horny! **slowly starting to back up towards the road.**

_**Suddenly Glory appears; saving everyone from an uncomfortable situation…**_

Glory: Give me the bunny slippers!

Buffy: what? Why would you wan…(is cut off by glory)

Glory: they were a gift and I need to return them!

Buffy: **cocks eyebrows** are you sure?

Glory: yess, now; GIVE THEM TO ME!

Buffy: but then I won't have any shoes!

Glory: I don't care! I don't like you!

Townsfolk: **gasp**

Buffy: you don't like me **looks close to fainting** but-but, everyone likes me!

Glory: humph… well I don't!

Buffy: I-I I gotta get home **grabs Clem's chicken wings and runs into the forest followed closely by Toto, who is struggling to keep up in the dog suit**

Clem: YOU OWE ME FOR THE CHICKEN WINGS!

Devon (to glory): hey baby, what's your sign?

Glory: oh God! **rolls eyes**

Devon: _yes_?

Glory: I need my slippers.

Devon: I need a re-fill **goes looking for more rum and coke**

Anya: I need a better facial cleanser!

Dawn: I need to go find a better part in this movie.

Clem: I miss my chicken wings!

The Gentlemen: so uhh why are we here? Oh right outta the goodness of out '_hearts_' **they all hold up 2 hearts in each hand**

Oompa lumpas: **are arguing in the corner with Grumpy who isn't really supposed to be there**

_Somewhere a bell rings to tell the actors to get off the set and everyone walks away, while background guy #1 changes the background into a farming area and a road. Buffy walks on scene and 3, 2, 1… go!_

Buffy **:starts skipping down the road munching on the chicken wings **tra la la la la!

_Spike/scarecrow jumps out into the middle of the road from a cornfield…_

Spike/scarecrow: well aren't you a saucy little girl **cocks an eyebrow**

Buffy: why yes, yes I am. **takes the napkin Spike/scarecrow offers her and wipes the sauce from the chicken wings off her hands and fingers **thanks…

Spike/scarecrow: so where are you headed on this fine sunny day?

Buffy: don't I know you?

Spike/ scarecrow: um, no…

Buffy: **shrugs** I'm gonna go see this wizard guy that might be able to send me home

Spike/scarecrow: where is home?

Buffy: for you or me?

Spike/scarecrow: I CAN'T REMEMBER MY HOME!

Buffy: why can't you remember your home?

Spike/scarecrow: what's a home?

Buffy: **rolls eyes** what's wrong with you? It's like you woke up with no brain.

Spike/scarecrow: maybe I did… I CAN'T REMEMBER!

Buffy: well you _are_ made of straw…

Spike/scarecrow: bloody hell, I am! I'M MADE OF BLOODY STRAW!

Buffy: **cocks an eyebrow** you didn't notice?

Spike/scarecrow: **shakes head sadly and tries to light a cigarette**

Buffy: STOP! You'll catch fire!

Spike/scarecrow: what's that then? I can't even smoke! Well, being made out of straw really is a cock and two meatballs

Buffy: what

Spike/scarecrow: this stinks.

Buffy: **looks scared** well. I'll just be going now… **tries to inch away**

Spike/scarecrow: your leaving already! But I don't even know where my home is!

Angel/Toto: bark bark **growls….**

Spike/scarecrow: eep… nice… what ever it is you are…

Buffy: down Toto! Well, if not having a brain is _that _bad I guess you could come with us.

Spike/scarecrow: really! You're my BEST FRIEND! Well at least I think you are… I don't know

Buffy:oookay

_They walk in silence for a while until they reach a fork in the road…_

Buffy: that's a really big fork! I've never seen such a big fork

Spike/scarecrow: maybe a giant got tired of its silverware

Angel/Toto: **looks annoyed** woof

_They walked for another little while and came to a cross roads_

Buffy: which way, left or right?

Spike/scarecrow: **shrugs**

_They stand there for a while waiting for the answer to this riddle when suddenly…_

Spike/scarecrow: look a big shiny man!

Buffy: what?

Spike/scarecrow: over there **points to the guy wrapped in tin foil just beyond the trees**

Buffy: hey you're right! Why didn't we see that before?

_So they start over to the man when suddenly Glory appears out of a poof of smoke and is now blocking the way…_

Buffy: greeeat… it's you again. **rolls eyes**

Glory: yes it is I! I still want those slippers you little brat!

Buffy: never! My feet will get cold!

Spike/scarecrow: it's true you know

Glory: **looks at the spike-crow** who the hell are you?

Spike/scarecrow: **gets all teary** I CAN'T REMEMBER!

Glory: wow, sucks to be you…

Spike/scarecrow: YESS IT DOES!

Glory: **turns to Buffy** why do you keep him around!

Buffy: I keep asking myself the same question

Glory: well I was going to take care of you myself but seeing as he annoys me I'll have to use my magic.

Buffy: **looks skeptical** you have magic?

Spike/scarecrow: WHY DON'T YOU LIKE ME?

Glory: oh jeeze, I can't even complete my villain-ie plans without being interrupted! **wiggles nose and makes the tinfoil guy become alive. Then crosses her arms and nods which poofs her out.**

_Meanwhile the tinfoil man is making his way towards them…_

Spike/scarecrow: by George watch out for that tin man!

A hahahaha yess if the story didn't kill you the cliffhanger will! O yea! Please R&R! thanks to last chapters reviewers! And to answer some questions from them, no I didn't get this idea from a challenge, I came up with it all by myself… lol the idea of Spike having no brain intrigued me. And yes last chapter did end abruptly, so did this one, but that's just the way it goes, please keep reading.


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